Action Addict

Chapter 2: What Happens When Everything Stops?

For those of you that are following my post "What Is The Cost of Rest?", here is our progress:


Dave and I actually had a discussion about chapter 2! And i am tickled to write on behalf of the both of us!

Don’t get me wrong, Dave and I talk…about kids, food, finances, laundry…but dedicated time about God, very, very cool!

(What a great 12 years anniversary present!)

Our unanswered question is: Should what you rest from be a sacrifice or a gift?

When I asked Dave what he would be willing to give up for 24 hours he said." cleaning the house."

I found myself immediately jumping in, "But that is no sacrifice." (I think that was my Lent history kicking in?)

Questions and Answers

One great this about this book is the though provoking (or reality check) Questions at the end of each Chapter. The leader of our group also adds questions that may affect our local group specifically.

On to OUR answers:
Questions #1: Reflect on the word "stop". If God were to ask you to stop something for 24 hours each week, what might it be?

Dave’s comment was: "Stop for 24 hours in a row?"
Kym: I equate STOP with LAZY. (This has not been a great equation for the members of my family ;0)

Questions #2: Think of a time when you were forced to stop, like a power failure or the ice storm. Outside of it happening unplanned; what did you enjoy? What did you learn? What did you find difficult?

We thought about times we were sick, weather effects. Dave contemplated winter, when he is deprived of golf… but we learned more from our "Sabbath Dry Run" last week.

Dave liked the rest initially but felt bored quickly. He admitted that doing family stuff actually tires him out sometimes, and do we get to rest from that on the Sabbath?

I enjoyed playing games with the kids and making muffins that we shared throughout the day (ps someone please tell me calories do not exist on the Sabbath!).

I did not like the constant feeling of laziness and need to suppress my mouth.

I did not share this with my family, but I had committed to giving my family a Sabbath from me!

I needed a day not to be the "Project Manager" and they needed a day not to be managed.

I think this went over famously! I even had a few requests of how they could help and a few random acts of kindness…(dishes finding the sink, kisses for no reason)

Addie loved afternoon tea and alone time with me.

We let the boys play video games (BAD IDEA) but this was a trial run... We can ALWAYS adjust this activity.

I think we kinda, "Forgot to Remember God"…we do not know what traditions we want to do to recognize God. We pray, but we do that every day…again a work in progress. Gladly accepting any successful suggestions!

One if the items we did address with the kids, was that we did not what to cause work for others on the Sabbath. (That may have been me trying to micromanage just a tad, but I knew I would be cleaning up from Sabbath on Monday.)

What We Took Away From Our Sunday "Practice"

We honor God the most when we enjoy and grow in the relationships he has given us.

Whatever we do on Sabbath, as long as it is meant as worship, it is pleasing to God…and we all to that differently! So, where I may want to sing at the top of my lungs, my daughter may paint, my oldest create a lego buildings, my 4 year old make up a great story, or my husband resting from my chaos (hee hee)...you may need to do something differently.

3.On pg 35, Carl makes some Thought provoking statements "We are human beings yet we live as we are human doings" We move through our days as if what we do mattered more than who we are….

Dave: Does not need to be in constant motion, but wants it to be his option. He does not liked being told what he can’t do.

Kym: I am an "Action Addict". The more you do = the better you are. I know this is skewed thinking but it is my natural tendency.

The main items that caught Dave regarding this chapter:
1. How different faiths choose their day of rest. (Ex Jewish versus Muslim)
2. That when Lynne and Dave came back to the US. Christians were not interested.

My main item: Sabbath is not another day to be in control.

Kym and Dave Lamb

No Milk, No Eggs,No Bread But the Mortgage is Paid

Everyone Please Stand and Do The Happy Dance!

If you read my blog January 17th, The Mortgage Won't Pay Itself...you know why we are dancing!


We closed on the loan last night! After almost 4 months of paperwork, phone calls, emails and home repairs, we did it!

Do You Need Help?

If you do not know about the Making Homes Affordable program go there now - I need help. This program is designed to help people refinance and renegotiate their loans.

Do not wait!

Dave and I felt guilty for not knowing what the scammers were doing. We felt responsible for UNFAIR debt!

If Your Still Reading

Ok...if you are still reading then either:

(1) your mortgage is great;
(2) your in denial, or ;
(3) you want details!

The Details

One requirement of our loan was to have windows and awnings painted and reinspected before we could close. YEAH, RIGHT! In December, in Ohio??????

We negotiated to set up an ESCROW account based on a quote for the work to be completed in the spring. This sounded great EXCEPT that we had to come up with 1.5 times the amount needed in order to close!

Ugh! I had white paint in the garage! If I lived in sunny Florida, I could have gone out and slapped on the paint in a day. Now, at Christmas, we needed to find a way to save more money than we had been able to save in a year.

So, how did we do it?

Now don't click away and stop reading because you think the rest of the BLOG is about how great we are and how we did amazing things that no one could possibly do...

Here was our motivation: (the picture is my daughter's self portrait)

3 Beautiful Children

If we could save the required amount we would:

1. Reduce our dept amount by $40,000
2. Reduce our payment term by 10 years
3. Reduce our interest rate by 1.5 points
4. Lower our monthly payments

Every month we waited it was costing up more and more money.

What We Did

1. After we paid the absolute HAVE TO's we calculated what was left after we removed the amount needed.

2. Got the kids buy in! My kids are young,but NOT blind or deaf. Age 9, 6 and 4 they heard it from us, the news and their friends that everyone is having to scrimp and save.

I was even selfish enough to tell them, that if they could try really hard not to ask for something unless they needed it because Mom really had a hard time having to tell them not right now. ( I can count on 1 hand the requests I had! I love my kids!)

3. We divided up was was left over until the next paycheck. $400 for 2 weeks...OOPS! Let me correct that because we missed to large payments in our original calculations, so we were down to $200 for two weeks! (If you haven't counted yet, this is to feed a family of 5, gas, childcare...anyway you get the point.)

The Day of Closing

No Milk, No Eggs, No Bread.

The peanut butter jar licked dry and no red sauce to through on cheap pasta.

But we made it... AND WE DIDN'T NEED THE MONEY!

WHAT????

Someone please, take this money, you have NO IDEA what it took to gather these funds!

OK this is where I stop whining...Someone in "Mortgageland" or somewhere had worked the cost into the loan already. It was taken care of...

Thank You

(This is an excerpt of the Thank you Letter I sent to Jeff, our original loan officer who lost his job at GMAC but gave us hope.)

"In order to collect the money in time, Dave and I were forced to be disciplined in ways we didn't even know we could.

At the beginning of the month we shared with our children our goal and that it would affect them also.

We did it...did I have dinner for the night we closed, NO. Peanut Butter was gone, soup was exhausted. No eggs, no bread...I had finally resigned on that day to let my parents buy us groceries.

This month we had unexpected medical and dental bills and my client was unable to send his check... but we made it.

God is good."


Our Deepest Appreciation

These are the credits... so for those of you that have read this far this is the point in the movie where you either leave the theatre or wait for the outtakes...feel free to leave or stay and acknowledge the people that support us.

My sister Michelle: For pestering me and holding me accountable. Calling every so often just to be sure I had called about the "opportunity".

Bob "G-PA": For your quiet wisdom and always clipping out items from here and there to help us.

Jeff Sorrells: For allowing me the tears, frustration, confusion, ignorance and humanity. Not all angels have wings! The next company that snags you up is blessed!

Heather Lilly: You had big shoes to fill and you stepped up! I already told you this but, Thank you again for staying on top of this, putting up with my directness and allowing us to hit a due date we literally could not afford to miss.

Deb Shoemaker: Thank you for making the closing process painless and taking the time to tolerate my distrust of all those with packs of paper requiring me to sign my life away ;0)

Gamma and Poppy Strimple: You know I have not listed people in order of importance...Thank you for support in more ways than I will ever even realize. No matter how full your plates are you ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS take care of others. Thank you for your example, guidance and love.

To the rest of our family and friends that have supported us through is "opportunity" and many others we give you our deepest gratitude and love.

Dave and I will be celebrating our 12th Wedding Anniversary on Sunday knowing that we have secured shelter for our family now and the future... THE BEST PRESENT WE COULD EVER GIVE EACH OTHER!





(Disclaimer: No child missed a meal during this process.It may not have been want they wanted or as much as they were used but they survived... and are maybe even better for the sacrifice.)

What Is The Cost of Rest?

Still...Calm...Peaceful......at rest.

Do you recognize these words? When was the last time you could have described your day, and hour, a moment with one of these words?

When was the last time you gave yourself permission to stop?

Why do we need to justify our existence by constant motion?

Author Lynne Baab asks this question in "Sabbath Keeping".

Now do not turn me off because I just used the word Sabbath. This is not as much about a faith as it is a reality. Days of rest are not only recognized in structured religions (Jewish, Christian, Babylonian rest days, Buddhist rest day, Sabbath as Saturday, Islamic rest day, Wiccan sabbat, Bahá'í weekend, Unification Sabbath) but also in secular traditions.

If you leave a toy turned on...how long will it last? What eventually happens?

Why would we think that our human bodies do not have an expiration dates...body and mind.

Do You Remember When?

Do you remember when the only businesses open on Sundays where gas stations?

Are you old enough to have rushed on Saturday morning to get everything to the bank by noon, then hit the grocery store before it closed on Saturday so you had milk for breakfast on Sunday?

Do you remember when it was taboo to schedule practices or events on Wednesday nights or Sundays?

What Is the Benefit of Being a 24X7 Society?

Is there one? What have you been able to accomplish by working around the clock?

How much time are you saving by correcting mistakes because someone was exhausted?

What relationships have you made that could not have been tended to at 5pm instead of 2am?And because you were so exhausted from being up at 2am, you didn't welcome your child's 8am wake up kiss?

And really...are you saving any time by calling a landline, cellphone sending a text, a tweet and a ping and then trying to get the person on Skype?

And by the way...how much junk are you loading up on others by your impatience?

What Is The Real Question?

What are you risking my NOT learning to rest????????????????

Please join this conversation as I progress through "Sabbath Keeping"

For those of you that may be observing a sabbath or rest...Please share the benefits and the detriments of your discipline.

For those that feel they accomplish more in life without rest....same question: What are the benefits and the detriments?


Now Go Rest!

The Mortgage Won't Pay Itself!

OK...this one is short and sweet. If you are having trouble paying your mortgage go this website right now http://makinghomeaffordable.gov/ .

This is the government site that will step you through if this is a possible option for you and how to work with your lender.

I would be lying if I told you it was an easy process...My husband and I started this process early in October and as of today the loan still has not closed. BUT IT IS NECCESARY!

My husband and I where taken by a dishonest company. They no longer exist and we thought we were just stuck with the effects of this event. We had resigned to the fact we had been lied to and it was our responsibilty to dig our way out.

NOW READ THIS

Family had given us information about this plan last fall and after being completely overwhelmed and in depression from our circumstances I called. They could help!

...and YES I cried...balled like a baby. My loan officer Jeff allowed me the tears, frustration and anger and within 24 hours I had my first packet of to do's.

I will sing praises for Jeff. He provided HOPE. He even sent emails just to ask if we were ok...

Eventhough my HOPE is gone...Jeff was layed off in December... I am working with another rep and if all goes as planned should be closing by the end of the month.

I can't guarantee that you will get an amazing rep that really cares about your situation an you as a person. I can't guarantee that the rep you get will even like you...but I can guarantee that if you do nothing...YOU RISK LOSING EVERYTHING

I will not give the exact details of our loan, but I can tell you that we had some debt forgiven, interest rate lowered, number of payments years reduced and monthly amount lowered and when the loan closes I look forwarding to breathing again...PRICELESS.

The first call wasn't easy but neither was carrying the burden of losing the shelter for our family. Make the call! Take the steps! Now BREATH........

Have You Polished Your Marriage Today?

Several years ago I learned a trick to keep my mouth in check...

When I brush my teeth, I make sure to scrub the tongue too! Not just because the dentist says to, but because it reminds me how filthy my tongue can get if I don't actively keep it in check.

I don't "swear like a sailor" or make it my daily goal to crush people with my words. But if I don't take time to remember how easily I can crush someone, I will.

THIS MORNING

I started using this method with my wedding ring this morning. A little gentle toothpaste and an old toothbrush. And man did it need it!

I forgot how beautiful my ring was...is.

My husband went to the jewelry store several times, before he picked out the perfect stone. (The salesperson shared this with me when we went to get it sized.)

Is it a flawless stone? No. But it is perfect.

It is no longer round...12 years of wear have made it a little flat on one side and slightly warped on the other. A prong has been replaced over and over. And ONLY by the grace of God, it still fits my finger, even-though my finger as has changed its size 6 shape to accommodate on a now size 8 finger.

PERFECTION

But it is perfect. The light gets captured inside and randomly bounces around hitting facet after facet like a pinball machine until the spark bursts out of the center and pierces my eye racing directly to my heart... to remind me, it is perfect.

Have you polished your marriage today?

I'm glad I did. And I look forward to doing it again tomorrow!

Pay For One Strep Test, Get the 2nd Test FREE!

"Gaeitha, I am sorry to have to ask this, but how much will the lab charge me for the services?"

In 10 years I have never asked what I would be charged to have medical tests performed for my children...

Some of you may be saying shame on me. I think the majority of you, however, are in my shoes.

As I took my 2 children in the office yesterday, I was confronted with questions I have never had to consider.

To the applause of my childcare provider they were patient, understanding and helpful.

As I juggled my cell phone in one ear, to verify if I could actually be at this office, the nurse took my children's temps, showed me an understanding smile and waited for the verdict.

Yes! We can be here, but OOPS! we didn't send you the card you need to pay for it. (This was followed by the steps I needed to have the office do for them to get paid.)

As I finally focus on my children, I learn that additional tests will follow. Here was the bombshell ," Kym, it may be cheaper to have the lab do these tests."

Up until this point, I have never once thought about pricing my child's care!

January 1, 2010 - Welcome to your new insurance plan!

With the changes in Medicare and job situations for the majority of our country, we find ourselves on the phone with the insurance company, our pharmacies, our old doctors who "AREN'T IN THE PLAN" and our "new" doctors that "ARE IN THE PLAN".

Yesterday, a 30 minute visit took me 2 1/2 hours + a 2 1/2 hour wait for the prescription and left me with buyer's remorse.

Think about this quote,

"Kym, we bargain shop for everything,why wouldn't we also want the lowest price for our health care services?"

One side of my brain says, "DUH?" But the other says, "BECAUSE IT IS HEALTHCARE!"

I am not buying designer shoes or a fuel efficient car! I do not want my physicians and nurses becoming businessmen. I want them being doctor's and nurses.

My office cared enough to step me through the process. They let me know my options. They helped me get the price comparison to make a smart decision.They know that my new insurance puts me in charge of my benefit dollars, but what experience do I have?

I am asking more questions that I ever had, make sure you are too!

PS I think I may need to call a psychiatrist when this is all said and done. I wonder when I can BING a price quote for the most cost effective one!

Captain's Log - Star Date 01.01.2010

Can you remember reading comics or watching movies when "2000" was some fascinating time?

The flying cars and “Beam-me-up-Scotty-machines?

How about partying like it was 1999? What is the party year to shoot for now?

I must admit. I feel a little let down. Here it is 2010. I do not have my flying car yet and much to my children’s chagrin they still have an hour car ride to Gamma & Poppy’s.

Let me be more specific about my sadness. It is NOT because I need the newest gadget or the most high tech gizmo.

I need the wonder and awe of “WHAT IS TO COME” BACK!

Somehow, somewhere, I lost it. I fell asleep and my wonderful dreams were replaced by FEAR and DREAD of the unknown.

This year I am reclaiming my wonder and awe! I dare you to do it with me!

What place have you not visited?

What dream have you not lived?

What legacy have you not started?

OK Captain, what will your entry be for “Captain’s Log, Star Date 01.02.2010?